One Step Closer to Emotional Wholeness

A journey toward emotional wholeness begins with a heart full of pain. The path ahead void of light. A wish for internal peace not yet experienced. And the thought, “Surely this is not how life should be.”

But how does one change the hopelessness of a hurting heart? Do people grow up happy and carefree? Or perhaps fate smiles on some and not others.

The Journey Begins

My own journey began in my early twenties just out of college. My hopes high with a new career in nursing and a newly wed shortly after graduation. Certainly, everything would be fine. Lots of new things and a future filled with hope.

But harsh realities loomed large. Self-doubts rose in my high stress job in a critical care unit. My quiet demeanor a bull’s eye for bullies and more aggressive personalities in the workplace. Discouragement replaced high expectations.

Then a sweet baby on the way in a marriage with two individuals with lots of baggage from formative years and differing illusions of how life should go.

Add to that grief following the death of my mother as I cared for my infant son.

Depression

A cloud of depression descended upon my psyche as difficulties bombarded my small world.

My one vice for coping was the endorphin rush obtained from jogging. As a graduate from a college that required weekly aerobic points, I knew the benefits of regular physical activity. Along with fitness and weight control came some positive thoughts and new energy.

The feel-good hormones were a bright spot in my day and with them came the realization that I had been depressed most of my young life growing up.

When my mother was diagnosed with cancer, I clung to my jogging habit hoping to avoid any deeper depression. I completed a 10K run in the city where I lived the same month she passed.

My emotions held until the grief hit, helpless as I plummeted into a downward emotional spiral of dispair. The ever-present dark cloud lingered. The lie of less-than and unworthiness grew into hopelessness.

My husband and myself, both in need of hope and healing, went to a faith-filled mega-church. Here we were met with the truth of God’s word.

Most Sundays I sat in the large crowd and cried silently as I listened and prayed for emotional healing and wholeness. Uncertain of what that would look like. My desperate whispers of prayer were like unattainable fantasies. But my hope was alive and my faith growing.

And in church I heard hope filled verses like “with God all things are possible.”

Thankfully my prayers for heard by a faithful God. The journey began here. What a wonderful first step toward emotional wholeness.

Prayer for Today

Father, I pray for all who suffer from mental, spiritual and emotional difficulties. Please meet each person’s need as only you can. Grant peace where there is suffering, and hope where there is none. Amen.

Scripture for Today

“But Jesus looked at them and said to them, “With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible”” (Matthew 19:26 NKJV).

Mental Health Awareness Month

May is Mental Health Awareness Month. And thankfully funding for individual affected has increased dramatically. Many suffer emotional and mental difficulties that make life difficult to bear and sometimes we all need help. If you need help the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration may be a good place to start.